Memories make us who we are.
The memories you hold on to, record, photograph, retell, shape who you become.
We know that humans equate perception to reality. We participate in reality based on what we choose to remember. These chosen memories shape how we perceive ourselves, our family, our marriage, our children, friends, work, church, neighborhood, our county, etc.
For some of us, we have a disposition to only remember the sunny stuff, that which makes us smile, look good, and be happy. Others of us tend to remember what went wrong, what we regret, and how life has not gone how we wanted it.
Remembering is also a central part of the Christian scriptures.
The Eucharist, or what Christians also call Communion and the Lord’s Supper is given to us by Christ Jesus as a way to remember him, the gospel, and his call on our life to follow him. We read Scripture to remember God. It’s how we become Christians, “remembering” the stories that came before us to make it possible now to have a life in communion with Christ.
The New Testament Gospels and Epistles are shaped by memories, written by Christians to remember the life, ministry, crucifixion, resurrection and ascension of the Lord Jesus and the acts of the apostles across the Middle East, Europe, Asia, and Africa.
In the Gospel according to the apostle Matthew, he includes some of the story of Judas betraying Jesus at the Passover Meal. The story of betrayal is fascinating and heart-breaking, and by remembering it, we learn more about the depths of Jesus faithfulness to his disciples and his forgiveness of our sins.
St. Paul writes to Christians in Rome, a collection of believers made up of Jewish merchants and synagogue attenders, Greek and Roman citizens, and those from many different tribes and socio-economic classes – soldiers, slaves, barbarians, the poor and crippled, reminding them: “Contribute to the needs of the saints; extend hospitality to strangers. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them.”
What do the Christians in Rome choose to remember about the poor among them? That they are children of God or lazy? What do they decide to recall about strangers? That they are to be feared or to be given hospitality? What do they recollect about their enemies? That they are to be punished or to be blessed?
Our memories of Jesus will shape what we bring to mind about the poor, strangers, and enemies.
Memories aren’t passive though, they don’t just randomly come to surface, and you are not beholden to what you “happen” to remember. You can do memory work, and you can choose what to emphasize when you remember an event.
There are no “neutral” or “natural” rememberings – all memories are biased, edited, and distorted in some way.
That’s why remembering in community can be so powerful, retelling shared memories helps you remember elements you had forgotten, misunderstood, or edited in such a way that they are now wiser and encouraged because of what others remembered alongside you.
This is central to the Christian practice of Communion, and why it is central to our worship gatherings in church.
You are what you remember. The YMCA. Church. Home. Neighborhoods. Nations.
You get to choose alot of what you remember.
Becoming grateful for what you remember – in an honest, courageous, humble way – helps you accept yourself and what has happened in your life.
This is important to confessing and repenting, to making amends, and helping heal who you’ve wronged and what’s been broken.
We don’t have to like the pain and suffering that we remember.
But if want it to become a part of our Christian story such that it fuels courage, resiliency, and loving-kindness, then we need to learn to accept what we remember with gratitude and submit it to the Lord (like Matthew and Paul in the New Testament).
The stories you remember and choose to tell around the table, at work, on long car rides, relaxing on vacation, during family celebrations powerfully shape who you are, and obviously how people see and understand you.
We are what we remember.
Remember faithfulness.
We know that anxious Mary the mother of Jesus stayed at the foot of the cross during his execution, risking her own life to be there with her condemned son until the very end.